PESSIMISM - a tendency to see the worst aspect of things or
believe that the worst will happen; a lack of hope or confidence in the future.
A belief that this world is as bad as it could be or that evil will ultimately
prevail over good.
OPTIMISM - hopefulness and confidence about the future or the
successful outcome of something. The doctrine, especially as set forth by 17th/18th century
German philosopher Leibniz, that this world is the best of all possible worlds.
Introducing…
REALISTIC OPTIMISM - A realistic optimist
is defined as someone who looks on the bright side of life but has a realistic grasp
on the present and what to expect in life.
Backlash, disbelief,
disgust, false accusations, a keen dismissal, signs of anti-Pollyanna,
unbelievable, out of touch with reality, insults, judgment, criticism,
skeptical, point of making fun, happy idiot syndrome, impossible.
Signs of a pessimist in a
conversation on happiness are highly apparent.
People have written books,
articles, tv appearances all negating the positive effects positive psychology
can have on someone’s life.
It is really hard to
believe that America’s population is 17% optimally functioning and one in four
people has a mental disorder.
So it never surprises me
when I come across someone who has a hard time believing in the power of
positivity.
The role of pessimism and
optimism in sustainable happiness is a very important point to address.
Jinendra Swami, Messenger of Sustainable
Happiness, taught me, ‘What you mind believes your body will achieve”
Dr Robert Muller, Holocaust
survivor, Nobel Peace Award Nominee, Former Assistant Secretary General of the
United Nations, Author of ‘Most of all they Taught me Happiness’ taught me
about the power of intention.
When your intention and
your beliefs align in a positive direction you are able to enhance your human
experience.
During the dance of
conflict in a conversation concerning sustainable happiness, I introduce the
concept of realistic optimism.
A middle road of pessimism
and optimism.
The main difference between
the two is the notion of hope and empowerment.
Moving from hopeless to
hopeful is a dynamic shift in your psychology. One I have experienced
multiple times.
When people have given up
hope on traditional methods of feeling better, they are hopeless and
pessimistic.
When discovering a
sustainable happiness doctor or positive psychology, a lot of times, people
cloud the experience with a projection that ‘this will never work’, ‘I’m your
worst client’, ‘nothing works for me’
Encountering this mindset
over and over, I see change. I see results. I see hope when there
was no hope. I see happiness when there was depression.
In 2007, researchers at NYU discovered
the optimism center of your
brain. This point in the brain can be a cause of depression if not exercised.
Here is a brain image: showing greater activity in brain’s rostral anterior cingulate cortex,
TOP, and amygdala, BOTTOM, when subjects imagined positive future events.
Here is a brain image: showing greater activity in brain’s rostral anterior cingulate cortex,
TOP, and amygdala, BOTTOM, when subjects imagined positive future events.
So when sitting down with a
pessimist, I ask…
What is your positive to
negative thought ratio?
Usually the answer is
tipped in the negative direction.
I use this as a ‘fact’ to
show the pessimist that no matter what the topic may be, albeit happiness,
marriage, business, etc, because of the skewed way of thinking then I am up
against the general negative thinking ratio before I open my mouth.
This is a confronting
experience for some as thinking of putting their thought habits in a ratio form
is something new.
So I ask you…
What is your positive to
negative thought ratio?
Is it what you want it to
be?
How often are you feeling
bad vs feeling good?
Do you want to change this
thought ratio?
When learning the 5 steps
to sustainable happiness this is a skill developed in steps two and three:
positive mood and resiliency.
Realistic Optimism is key
for your sustainable happiness.
Paying attention to
developing your own optimism is essential for you to feel better now.
Listen to the discussion I
have with @frandrescher about Realistic Optimism
Do you want to contribute
to this conversation?
Dr Aymee Coget
Sustainable Happiness Doctor
Sfhappinessdoctor at gmail dot com
Author of Forthcoming book – Sustainable Happiness in 5
Steps
www.happinessmakeover.com
www.happinessmakeover.com
