Defacing the Sustainable Happiness Myth of Eliminating ‘negative’ Emotions

Definitions:

Eliminate – to remove

Negative- undesirable

Emotion – an affective state as the result of a thought

When people first are introduced to the concept of sustainable happiness, many times there is a look of disbelief as what I am saying is contrary to everything they know.

One of the common understandings of happiness in general is that it is a fleeting emotion that comes sometimes in your life.

Another understanding is that we have a repertoire of emotions the idea of only focusing on one seems to be contrary to the human experience?

Why would you want to be happy all of the time?

If you are happy all the time, then you must be out of touch with reality.

Why would I want to help people become bubbling happy idiots for no reason who block their natural emotional human experience?

By no means am I suggesting people ignore, repress or rid themselves of any ‘negative’ emotions.

The human brain is an active and complex bio-phenomenon and the human mind is a multidimensional invisible constantly changing affective state that is adjusting to the current moment. 

The mind over matter concept is one I do believe in.

However,

Do I believe it is possible to Eliminate Negative Emotions? No

Do I tell people to Eliminate Negative Emotions? No.

Do I expect people to Eliminate Negative Emotions? No.

Do I think it would be detrimental to Eliminate Negative Emotions? YES.

Do I think it is possible to control your Negative Emotional Experience? YES.

Do I think it is important to learn emotional regulation and intelligence? YES.

Have I eliminated negative emotions from my life even after 18 years of happiness immersion? No.

Putting the value connotation on an emotional experience has its consequences.

Yes, psychology, positive and traditional label emotions as negative and positive.

Some ‘negative’ emotions help you languish and some ‘positive’ emotions help you flourish.

So the push toward the positive really does have a biological reason that benefits you however we know the world that upsets us day in and day out does not stop.

People say and do things all of the time that hurt my feelings.

I look at a lot of the ‘negative’ news in the world and I don’t feel ‘happy!’

Terrible things have happened to me to make me sad, upset, angry, scared, resentful, and disappointed.  Some of which have me managing trauma on a daily basis.

So all the ‘cherry on top’ or ‘frosting on the cake’ you want to make sustainable happiness out to be, is inaccurate.

Every single person has struggles, challenges, obstacles, and people places or things in their life where navigating the waters of negativity becomes the truth instead of running away from the negative experience or turning your back or repressing or ignoring it exists; I introduce the concept of resiliency.

This is step three of sustainable happiness.

One where skills are taught, emotional intelligence is heightened, time in a ‘negative’ state is lessoned and greater well being is the consequence and the reward.

“Negative’ emotions are here to stay in our brain as our thoughts will create them.

The purpose of the human experience in self development is to grow, learn, manage, and become aware of your thoughts and perceptions as it relates to the outside world.

In the teaching of sustainable happiness, happiness is more than an emotional state, which is only one type of happiness. 

So do I plan on eliminating negative emotions?

No.

I plan on educating people on how to identify the cause of the emotional experience, grow awareness as to why it is present, honor the experience and use tools from positive psychology to ignite resiliency to build resources internally and externally. Consequently increasing well being.

Dr Aymee Coget

Sustainable Happiness Doctor

Author of Forthcoming Book : Sustainable Happiness in 5 Steps

sfhappinessdoctor at gmail dot com

www.happinessmakeover.com

5 Steps Audio Program

Bliss in Business: The Role of Business in using Gross National Happiness as an agent of world benefit

In 1972, the King of Bhutan introduced Gross National Happiness (GNH) as the guiding philosophy as the countries development. Now the UK and several other countries are starting to also adopt this principle as a primary concern at the governmental level. Nobel Laureate Professor Daniel Kahneman is currently helping several countries in measuring the GNH. This is undoubtedly a wave of the future. 

The standard of living, health of the population, education, ecosystem vitality and diversity, cultural vitality and diversity, time use and balance, good governance, community vitality, and emotional well being are the nine provisional (GNH) indicators identified by the Center for Bhutan Studies. Imagine if all countries adopted this principle; we could transform our Earth into a paradise. 

Since implementing the GNH measure, Bhutan has reported an increase in life expectancy by 19 years while the gross enrollment rate in primary schools has reached 72 percent and the literacy rate has grown from 17 percent to 47.5 percent according to the Times newspaper of India. Not to mention it is a leading country in sustainability. Again, the implications for countries that take a stand on the importance of happiness is desirable for their citizens and is clearly the next step beyond the industrialized GNP that has been emphasized in Western society. In his introduction to Well-Being: the Foundations of Hedonic Psychology (63), Daniel Kahneman expresses the hope that hedonic science will prompt economics to shift its focus from 'those aspect of life that can be traded in the marketplace' to desirable goods such as love, mental challenge and (reduction of) stress'. 

This current and future transition has severe implications for the business sector as well as management scholars. Emphases on employee subjective well being (happiness) and positive affect have been growing bodies of research in the management literature only in recent years. It is clearly time for the business sector to not only take a stand in the ethics and morality of their accounting, corporate social responsibility, and environmental implications but also for the happiness of their employees. 

Linkages to the increase in the bottom line, performance, effectiveness, and productivity have all been shown as results of happy employees. In 2004, (Halverson, 2004) it was discovered that if your manager has positive affect because of emotional contagion theory, you are likely to also experience positive affect, which will improve performance. Federickson and Losada (2005) have identified that the more positive emotions that are experienced at work, will increase an individual’s scope of attention (Frederickson & Branigan, 2005; Rowe, Hirsch, & Anderson, 2005), broadens behavioral repertoires (Frederickson & Branigan, 2005), and increases innovation (Bolte, Goschkey, & Kuhl, 2003) and creativity (Isen, Daubmen, & Nowicki, 1987). Besides the aforementioned characteristics, positive affect has shown to make a difference in the health of our physical body which of course, leads to low absenteeism due to illness. (For a review see Frederickson & Losada, 2005). 
It is in the benefit of the business sector and in management scholarship to explicitly take on Bliss in Business especially as countries take on the GNH as a priority. 

Now that it is clear that happiness is a high human concern, and it is to the benefit to political and business sectors to adopt it as a moral obligation it is necessary to understand what it is that increases happiness in individuals. 

We propose a interactive workshop that pragmatically outlines a conceptual framework for managers to employ to help increase the happiness, well-being and positive affect of themselves and their employees. The techniques are inspired by the positive psychology movement, eastern philosophy, and the human potential movement. 

We would like to envision a future of business that recruits employees not only by the monetary benefits but also by also explicitly stating the importance of their happiness. If governments continue to move in the direction of enacting the GNH, business must follow in their moral obligation to help individuals and society at large. 

Dr Aymee Coget
Sustainable Happiness Doctor
Author of Forthcoming Book : Sustainable Happiness in 5 Steps
sfhappinessdoctor at gmail dot com
www.happinessmakeover.com
5 Steps Audio Program

Sustainable Happiness: Systematized & Automated

How can positive psychology help someone transition their own happiness from a mirage to a miracle?

How would our world be different if happiness, which is as basic as our water, food and air, became a human priority? What would change if each person were taught the basics of happiness like we learn the basics of mathematics?

There are many paths to the point of peace. This is one option.

The 5 steps to sustainable happiness were born from 18 years of experience helping others become happier.

When applying the process outlined here results have proved to be effective when traditional means of mental health failed.

This is a process that can be systematized and automated yet is made for the individual and can be moldable to each individual’s authenticity within themselves and in their lives.

The process begins with step one: empowerment.

This is a BIG FIRST STEP!  The user needs to want to change and make a difference in their lives.

The user listens and learns from sustainable happiness experts to the tune of a total of 90 years experience. 

There is a specific process outlined to educate on how to make the decision to be happy and why that is the first step.

After a short amount of time, the person feels empowered over their own happiness for the first time in their lives!  These experts make it easy to understand and implement IMMEDIATELY.

The second step utilizes scheduling software where there are specific positive psychology techniques scheduled in a morning, day & sleep routine.

Tools are provided for an improvement in positive thinking and living in the moment. These two happiness skills are sink or swim for anyone’s happiness.

As the user is learning how to apply positive psychology daily, the positive mood increases in longevity, depth of experience, emotional contagion in social network, and likely also an improvement in biological health and job performance.

The third step in the process is based in resiliency. Positive psychology offers tools of such to cope with life challenges.  This automation would provide real time solutions to real life problems so resiliency is increased exponentially.  Thus reducing time in unhappiness and increasing ability to bounce back fast or even become an Olympic hurdler never wincing at any of life’s challenges.

As empowerment, positive mood, and resiliency are the basics of happiness are perfected, the user can move on to more advanced states of happiness: contentment and bliss.

Step four, contentment kicks in and the user is guided through a specific step by step process to develop eudaimonia, lasting fulfillment. This is where specific activities are scheduled in the calendar for contentment development. Over time eudaimonia will grow and become a sustainable state of being independent of the emotional state.

The final step and most advanced state of happiness is bliss.  This can be scheduled throughout the day.  Two minutes of bliss whenever the user wants.

This systematized and automated process is based in expert guidance, a trademarked system, educational processes, easy implementation, authentic to each user.

Once happiness science is learned and implemented in a daily capacity benefits of happiness kick in. Sonja Lyubormirsky et al compiled a meta analysis of the benefits received by people who have experienced frequent positive mood in 2005.

In brief, life is better when happiness is a frequent experience.

Sustainable Happiness: Systematized & Automated.

Work in progress.

Dr Aymee Coget

Sustainable Happiness Doctor

Author of Forthcoming Book : Sustainable Happiness in 5 Steps

sfhappinessdoctor at gmail dot com

www.happinessmakeover.com

5 Steps Audio Program 

Accuracy in the PRESS

My first press appearance was in the New York Times in 2008 for the Happiness Makeover. A reporter interviewed me about the profession of happiness and on Thanksgiving Day, I saw a photo of myself in a major news publication.

Since then, my work has been featured on

Television

PBS, CBS, FOX & news I have consulted on has appeared on numerous local news channels around the country.

Magazines

Health Magazine, Self Magazine, Shape Magazine, Dr Oz Magazine, Sunset Magazine, and a French Travel Magazine

Newspapers

New York Times

Michigan

West Virginia

Bhutan

India

I have been asked to promote different causes and consulted on national topics like the future of happiness in America.

Usually when I am consulted by the media, there is someone who follows up to check the facts regarding any issue before it is launched into national publication or air time.

In my debut of the Dr Oz Magazine in the article of 8 Bright Ways to Feel more Positive, unfortunately there have been a few minor or major non facts depending on how you look at it mis-facts.

The journalist told me I would be interviewed for the topic of optimism.

After a 30 minute conversation, I was satisfied I gave a number of serious scientific advances in this topic area.

When the publication was on the newsstand, in every Whole Foods in America, I was a bit astounded at what I saw.

When I turned to page 138, I observed the following:

1) I was called a Psychologist.

2) My book was mentioned as if it was already released.

3) My name and comments were used to sell something.

If a fact checker were to have notified me prior to publishing this, I would have said…

1)   I am a Happiness Expert, instead of a Psychologist. My training is not of clinical psychology nor am I licensed to diagnose, let alone been trained in the disease model of mental health.  To set the record straight, my PhD is in organizational psychology with an emphasis in positive psychology and leadership. This has been my focus in my undergrad is in industrial and organizational psychology with an emphasis in employee happiness.  So after studying and teaching happiness for 18 years specifically which is not taught in traditional clinical programs, the proper way to refer to my profession is that of a Happiness Expert instead of a Psychologist.

2)    I am so excited for my book to be released!  It is published and ready for you yet I am working on finishing touches before it is ready to be available. If I was notified by a fact checker, I would have requested a word ‘forthcoming’ be put before my book was released.

3)    Usually if my name or expertise is used to sell something, I am notified. I have no opinion on the art supplies promoted on page 138 with my comment yet I do endorse art as a way to express yourself. If I was notified by a fact checker then I would have done due diligence in the product being endorsed.

In the world of media, after my involvement in a variety of ways, I noticed the importance of fact checking when it comes to large scale communication.

The Dr Oz magazine was my only experience thus far that failed to fact check, I understand this to be the first issue so perhaps the publication will learn for the second edition.

In the meantime, I contacted the journalist and the editor and asked for the changes to be made.

All in all, I AM HAPPY GRATEFUL AND OPTIMISTIC about the Dr Oz magazine and Dr Oz.  Though I do adhere to the importance of fact checking before publicizing.

As happiness science continues to evolve, your source of truth is of utmost importance. 

I will continue to speak out for a voice in leadership, positive psychology, global psychology and the media. 

Dr Aymee Coget

Sustainable Happiness Doctor

Author of Forthcoming Book : Sustainable Happiness in 5 Steps

sfhappinessdoctor at gmail dot com

www.happinessmakeover.com

5 Steps Audio Program